I suck at life, but I make a damn good martini.

wishingondisney:

STILL THE FUNNIEST THING EVER 

(Source: 42g33ks, via loyalbelieve)

Notes
155439
Posted
3 days ago

dave-stridesu:

blink182andbeyond:

cashcutie:

the story of a man and his unlikely friend

He’s probably from Florida

Florida Man Befriends Trespassing But Friendly Orange

(via blindcaius)

Notes
253508
Posted
3 days ago

rottensalts:

rottensalts:

I managed to make a fully interactive custom npc husband in Skyrim, but somewhere along the way I messed up so if I give him any items the sound of eating bread plays at full blast, nonstop 

reblog if you want a relationship like this

(via psycartist)

Notes
18505
Posted
4 days ago

spoopyshivers:

spoopyshivers:

why do old people read the bible so much

i asked the old guy standing in front of me at the post office and he said “it’s because we’re cramming for finals”

(Source: silentshivers, via annafofannabanana)

Notes
341934
Posted
1 week ago

kung-fwoo:

Funniest pokemon fusions ever

Notes
133
Posted
1 week ago

turkey-imported-from-maine:

firelorcl:

meladoodle:

i wanna be a reverse tooth fairy where i rob people and then scatter human teeth on their bed

a dentist

i dont know what your dentist is doing to you but i think you need to go to the police

(via balgruufthegreater)

Notes
291512
Posted
1 week ago
I can’t sleep. I have work in the morning. This is my 200th post. Why is this happening?

I can’t sleep. I have work in the morning. This is my 200th post. Why is this happening?

Notes
1
Posted
1 week ago
sublimesublemon:

sevvey6:

darklyspectre:

sucysucyfivedolla:

YES i’m a grill and YES i play games 

Wow another one of those “gamer grills”. they are just doing it for the attention. the nintendo isn’t even turned on.

neither is the grill

maybe not but i am

sublimesublemon:

sevvey6:

darklyspectre:

sucysucyfivedolla:

YES i’m a grill and YES i play games 

Wow another one of those “gamer grills”. they are just doing it for the attention. the nintendo isn’t even turned on.

neither is the grill

maybe not but i am

(via balgruufthegreater)

Notes
80083
Posted
2 weeks ago
TotallyLayouts has Tumblr Themes, Twitter Backgrounds, Facebook Covers, Tumblr Music Player and Tumblr Follower Counter